I was looking for something on the computer the other day and found this gem. I can't remember Luka being this small when we moved to this house. She's so tiny and baby like. It's crazy when you look at them and think they are so advanced, but really it's just your mama ears that understand everything your kid says.

I really miss my baby. I'm by no means saying that I am not fully enjoying my sweet, funny, talkative, assertive, and expressive toddler. I just miss my baby. Thank goodness for this digital age where we can capture nearly everything.

Love you baby Lu. Love you big girl Lu.

More No-hi-ee... please

I needed another Hawaii fix, and remembered that I had not loaded my pics from my Nikon. How can you not take a good picture with such incredible subjects. The landscape and the kid... ok so enough with the words and on with the pics. (but read on at the end)

The Curls.

This is what happens when your kid sleeps for 3 hours on the beach. They wake up dancing! Wouldn't you?!

14.5 years... still in love and hotter than we were when we met.

Canoe ride!

We're on stage at the Luau. I'm listening... Luka? Not so much. She knows her own dance.

The trip was really fantastic. You know how when you are on the plane on the way home and your exhausted and ready to be home and you feel stuffy, and stuck and tired and need to pee and need to stretch your legs...... dot dot dot, you feel like you're gonna loose it if the plane does not land NOW. Well try having all that and being 2. It's hard. And she lost it a little on the way home.

Let me set the scene: (imagine shrill screaming) "YOUR HURTING ME!!!!!!!!!" The seat belt is jammed up in her ribs but only because she's doing that little slippery move that only a child can do and the seat belt is no longer on her hips where it should be. So she unbuckles it. Over and over and over and over again. The nice stewardess comes by and offers help: "Hi Honey, the pilot needs to land the plane so you've got to put your belt on so we can land. Can you buckle up?" she said it so sweetly. "DOOOOON'T TALK TO ME! DON'T LOOK AT ME" (again screaming shrilly). I want to laugh and cry all at the same time.
I choose instead to ignore her. While I'm ignoring her, I'm suddenly thankful for the bastard last row of the airplane -don't recline - everybody's butt in your face while they wait for the toilet and shimmy around each other to make room for the beverage service cart (which is gonna take 800 years to get to us) - seats we are in. I'm thankful because there is no one behind us to watch us in our moment of toddler beauty. Dan and I look at each other and give each other the nod. It's the - we can't say anything else that will make this better so we just need to stop - nod. Then like a smack in the face I remember all the times I've spent in judgment of parents. Now, mind you I'm understanding and accepting, and don't go around hating on people. But given this situation I probably would have said some nasty mean thoughts about their parenting skills. "Oh great. Just ignore her, that's gonna help." or how about this one? "Woah, control your child". Ya, I've said those things before. I've even said them after being a parent. But who am I kidding some time's control is just gone. Some times you just lose it. Some times you have to stop feeding the beast for it to quit.

We stopped feeding the beast, and after about 5 minutes, she was quiet. And we made home safe. No one punched us, no one said anything to us, and no one even turned around to look at us in disgust.

mama, let's go to "no-hi-ee"

We've just returned from a family vacation to Hawaii. Dan's company sent him for a conference, and we tagged along to take advantage of the fact that his airfare, and room were paid for. We stayed in Waikiki at the Marriott. Lu and I had 2 days together while Dan attended his conference. We hung out at the pool & the beach both days. It was a blast. It's a struggle to figure out how to get a kid to nap and go to bed at night when there are so many exciting things to do in the pool, but we managed. We rented a car for the weekend and toured the island, stopping at a couple of truly beautiful places.

 

Diva, walking down the street with her smoothie telling me some story.

 

The best thing about going to Hawaii with such a cute little talkitive toddler, was listening to her say, Ah LOOOOOOOWWW HAH!! and calling Hawaii "No-hi-hee".

Too cute.

Her Infinate Wisdom: PART 2

From the mouth of my child as I cried in frustration:

"Mama, calm down. Calm down, mama."

From the mouth of my child as I stared at her with a spaced out 'I don't feel good' look:

"Still not feeling good, Mama? awwww, It's ok, Mama"

From the mouth of my child as we looked at each other in the mirror. (Me with Conjunctivitis (Pink Eye))

"Lemme see your eye, Mom. Yep, It's still pink, Mama."

From the mouth of my child as she described.... well we werent really sure for a few weeks: (Imagine arms spread out wide and sweeping around in slow dancer like motions)

'It's Magiloke!!"

We figured out a few weeks later, Magiloke = Magical. I wish I had never corrected her.

From the mouth of my child as she asks what you are doing:

"Papa, what are you're doing?"

Mama: Maker of eggs, protector of stuffed kitty cats.

About 45 minutes into her nap today, Luka came into the living room with her pants around her ankles... I think she must have been trying to go potty and was still really sleepy and confused about how to pull her pants up. She cried for a bit, and then came up into my lap. I was working on some things for my business that I've needed to get done, but forced my self to be in the moment. "How often is it that I get to have my child sleep in my arms any more?" I asked my self. She slept and she slept and she slept, making this a pretty record nap. It gave me a comfort that I have not felt in a while.

I am needed every day, for most everything. Wiping butts, kissing owies, changing clothes, making food, dropping off at school, answering questions, playing dolls, reading books... loving my child. 2 years ago I had a 6 month old child and was just heading back to work for the first time since delivering her. What a difference 2 years can make. Today as Luka slept in my arms (after I was able to transition us to a much more comfortable prone position on the couch) I looked at her face the way I was able to do when she was a baby. I stared at her for at least an hour. I didn't have to talk, answer questions, or do anything. I just had to sit and watch her breathe. Admire her face - those cute lips, her sweet soft skin. It was incredible.

It was hard after laying there for a while to not try and find something I could do while I laid with her on top of me. I kept forcing my self to be in the moment and be thankful that this is what my call of duty was at the moment. Reminding my self to be thankful it was not fielding a tantrum, or listening to whining, or rejecting another request to watch a movie. I just had to simply stare and love and breathe in a sweet, gorgeous, happy (for the time being) child.
These 2's have been hard on me recently. I've spent a few days wondering if it would be worth it for me to go back to work full time so that I could send her to school instead of being home with her part time. It's not worth it. Not after today at least. But ask me again on Wednesday after I've been home with her for 2 full days. 

Her Infinate Wisdom: PART 1

Luka has many things to share and many of them are so insightful. For those who have children, you will know exactly what I am saying. For those of you with out kids, these are those kind of things that come out of your childs' mouth that make you stop in your tracks and reevaluate, refocus, and remember what it's like to go about your day with curiosity, wonder, and simplicity.

While driving to the beach for a picnic, Lu saw the park out her window. She changed her mind and wanted to have our picnic there instead. So we followed her nose and turned to head to the park. There was a ton of construction and so I was not able to take the usual route I would have taken. I turned down a side street and the construction blocked my way again. I said out loud: "shoot, I went the wrong way." Luka pipes in from the back seat: "It's ok Mama, It's not the wrong way it's just another way."

Where her infinate wisdom comes from at such a young age I don't know, but I am happy to have it.

Thanks Luka.

Happy Halloween

Glowing Pumpkin, Roaring fire, Sweet baby profile

 Hope everyone had a fantastical Halloween. The clock ticks on and my child (and us) gets older by the minute and I am sitting by watching (not idly, mind you) this crazy miracle happen. She's so amazing. So wonderful, and full of..... amazing things. Tonight she walked up to the door of several homes alone (we were standing closely... don't worry) knocked, and quietly said "Trick or treat!" and then with some occasional prodding remembered to say thank you. Everytime someone kneeled to offer her the candy bowl, she shouted "Um, tsk (sort of a 'tisk' sound of her tongue) I like.... OH! The princess one." She refused to let anyone carry her candy bucket, even when it weighed her down, and made her wobble from side to side with each step as she tried to schlep it with her weight. We only went to a handful of houses! One guy just about dumped the whole bowl in her bucket. We met up with friends at a little Halloween party at C&P coffee.  It was awesome! So many decorations, kids and fun kid stuff. Cam was out back behind the half door attaching "fish" (aka goodie bags) to the fishing pole, pizza was on the table and the C&P gaggle ran amok. It was lovely. Eiler and Luka took to the streets after an hour or so of partying and raked in quite a load. I had hoped that the night would begin a little sooner so that we could come home for a fire and to pass candy out to the other trick-or-treaters. But maybe next year... How do people normally do it? One parent goes out with the kids, and the other stays home?

Well enjoy the fun I had playing with our Halloween photos below... Happy Halloween!

Having Fun with Picnik.com - Goulish little Cowgirls

This is how she poses for me. I have about 15 shots of this.

Another fun Picnik.com thing